On the Radio

Thanks to Beth Donovan and this funny pic posted on FB... ... I now have this stupid song wedged firmly between my ears!

That's a Big 10-4

My pal from the Northwoods and I have had an interesting email conversation today, risen from this John Hawkins post on what does and does not embody manliness and resulting in my pal's post here. But the whole email string was truly entertaining, and I share with you here the "she said/he said":

To:  MPFTN: 
Subject:  Why are you not... 

... writing your own column for PJ Media? You could run rings around this guy: 

http://pjmedia.com/lifestyle/2013/03/21/5-ways-to-forfeit-your-man-card/?singlepage=true 

To:  Omnibus Driver: 

I never come up with ideas such as the basic conceit behind the article. They just don't occur to me. But I agree that the guy could use better reasons than the implied: Because that's what men do. Real – adult – men have articulable reasons. "I like it" might be reason enough, but "It's ICKY!" probably isn't, unless the icky thing is DWTS or a movie in which men, in tight pants, tapdance. He who does not, at least occasionally, change his own oil is almost certainly useless. 

Pardon me while I sign up for a welding class. 

To:  MPFTN

It takes a real man to do succeed at DWTS, actually.  That is one hell of a physically demanding slog, and it takes nads of titanium to put on those costumes and compete in front of a live audience.  Honestly, from a woman's point of view there's nothing hotter than a guy who likes to dance, knows what he's doing, and can confidently make any girl instantly feel like a princess on a dance floor.  ("Splash," on the other hand, raises the "ICK" factor to new heights.  Or "Skating With The Stars."  Or any "Real Housewives Of" franchise.  Or "The Bachelor," fer cripes sake.)

Not every real man has to be mechanically inclined, but should have at least one manly talent at which he excels. (BTW -- it takes a real man to know when to ask for directions or where to find and when to call in an expert, as far as I'm concerned.) 

In any case, I don't understand the ridiculous and obvious examples Hawkins used. Surely there's a much murkier area where a guy certainly isn't in the extreme but also might have trouble completing his "man card" application? That's the group that my girlfriends and I wish would get a clue...  

To: Omnibus Driver

According to biographer James Parton (no relation to Dolly, so far as I know), Thomas Jefferson was "a gentleman of thirty-two who could calculate an eclipse, tie an artery, plan an edifice, try a cause, break a horse, dance a minuet, and play the violin." Too bad he couldn't also balance an account. (The minuet bit is a bit French for my taste, but it was the refined dance of the day and the outfits were merely formal, à la mode, so I won't protest too loudly.)  

Men may dance in casual clothes or tuxedos, with or without the rose (watch the prick!), and the ability to twirl-and-dip convincingly is not to be disparaged. But the tight and frilly Euro-weenie outfits are best left to Euro-weenies, who shall be scorned and reminded of the number of wars we had to fight for them in the twentieth century, and I don't think it was coincidence. The tight Castilian dancing outfit is permissible only on Castilian persons, gored bulls optional but guitars and castanets required. 

I've said this before, but it bears repeating: Women frequently do but should not confuse Prince Charming with a knight in shining armor. Knights in shining armor tend to watch football on their off-hours, drink beer, belch, growl at the dog, and throw their underwear on the floor, but charming princes tend to prefer the company of other charming princes, if you understand. 

To:  MPFTN

I'm in full agreement... with the caveat that maturity in females (emotional, not age chronological, that is) tends cause the tint in the rose-colored glasses to fade. Thank Jeebus. And for those of us former princesses who've decided to be queens of our own destinies/finances/happiness -- who says WE don't occasionally watch football in our off-hours, drink beer, belch, growl at the cat and throw our underwear on the floor? (At least when we're home alone and not expecting company.) 

Heh.

In Memoriam

It's taken a few days to process the news from my Biker Blogson that dear friend Donny "Walrilla" Smith had passed away.  That one took my breath away.

For those who had the pleasure of meeting him at a blog meet, I'll always remember him in the kitchen whipping up two of his down home Texas specials:

A steaming, spicy bowl of Texas red...

... and...

... a sweet and tangy slice of Vinegar Pah (Pie)

A do-rag wearing biker boy with a heart of pure mush, Camp BlownStar will never be the same without him.  

My thoughts and prayers go out to his family, who he loved very, very much.

Vaya con Dios, mi amigo.

Flora and Fauna

For Jihad Gene, who usually posts an "It's Friday!  Let's Dance!":



And, yes -- I was inspired:

Road Rage

Giggle Belly Laugh of the Day:



A huge tip of the cap to the Sweetheart of Shell Knob, MO.  That made my day!

In the Rear View Mirror

For a guy who didn't believe in life after death or immortality, Old Crankypants sure manages to manifest his presence on the internet and in the hearts of his friends and other music lovers:



Thanks, Catfish!  What a lovely surprise.

Batten Down The Hatches

My friend from the North Woods sent me the following:

THE NATIONAL HURRICANE CENTER IS ISSUING ADVISORIES ON TROPICAL STORM ISAAC...LOCATED INLAND NEAR MONROE LOUISIANA...ON RECENTLY UPGRADED HURRICANE KIRK...LOCATED ABOUT 1500 MILES WEST-SOUTHWEST OF THE AZORES...AND ON NEWLY FORMED TROPICAL STORM LESLIE....LOCATED ABOUT 1125 MILES EAST OF THE WINDWARD ISLANDS.

Oh, goody.  Someone finally paid attention to just what a force of nature I am...

Farmers Market

My friend El Capitan is bemoaning the fact that he needs to get off the packaged food and onto "rabbit food" again.  Since my last visit to the doctor, I've had to reevaluate my own eating habits, but have come up with a lunch that's not only healthy, but I look forward to every day:

Omnibabe's Yummy Summer Salad:

1 or 2 fresh, vine-ripened tomatoes, cut into chunks
3-4" piece of cucumber, quartered and sliced
A couple of green onions, sliced or a healthy handful of chopped sweet onion (Walla Walla or Vidalia)
Salt
Pepper
Feta, bleu cheese or goat cheese crumbles (or a handful of shredded cheese of your choice)
Kalamata olives
EVOO (don't be cheap -- buy a fancy-schmancy one)
Balsamic vinegar (or white balsamic)

Plus any or all of the following:

1/2 a red, yellow or orange pepper, rough chopped (or green pepper if you like 'em -- I don't)
1 small, ripe avocado, diced
Sugar snap peas, rough chopped
Thawed frozen peas
Thawed frozen corn
3-4" piece zuccini or summer squash, quartered and sliced
Handful of fresh broccoli or cauliflower, rough chopped
Chiffonade of fresh basil or oregano to taste
Handful of rinsed canned cannellini, kidney or black beans

And, if you really, really need animal protein:

1 small can of tuna packed in water, drained, or
1-2 strips cooked bacon, crumbled, or
Handful of chopped cooked chicken, or
Handful of chopped cooked turkey

NO LETTUCE!

Line a bowl with tomato, then salt and pepper to taste. Add the cukes on top, and salt/pepper again.*  Layer the rest of the veggies on top. Drizzle the whole mess with a little bit of olive and then a generous splooch of balsamic. Stir, cover and let sit for at least 15 minutes. Stir again, then garnish with a sprinkle of cheese crumbles (and a protein, if you need it -- I don't) and half a dozen olives.

This is seriously yummy stuff, which I now crave more than just about anything. I now keep a bottle of balsamic in the fridge and EVOO in the cupboard at the office and shop either the French Market at my train station, or the local farmers markets on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I'm eating fresh, healthy and TASTY (not to mention pretty darned cheap), and I'm never hungry.
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One More Thing:

Forget the low-fat salad dressing (which generally tastes like crap and is loaded with sugar).  Apparently you need a little fat in order to absorb the good stuff in your salad.
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*The salt helps release the juices in the tomatoes and cukes and, when mixed with the EVOO and balsamic, helps to make a lovely low calorie salad dressing.

Rubber-Necking

See you later, alligator!

Deer and cars collide all the time. But how often does a car get T-boned by a 12-foot alligator crossing an interstate?

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"Gator! Gator! Gator!"

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"The gator went flying, too."

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"He was real fat," said Mark Christopherson, 56.

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 Sorry, Jimbo. That article was just to rich with gatory goodness.

Street Views...

... both literal and figurative...

... in Althouse's back yard this weekend.  How'd she miss this?

Drive-Bys

When Chicago's Hull House announced that it was closing, there was a great hue and cry about it being such an icon and providing vital human services.  But, as Dennis Byrne says,

Wait, let me start again. No one more deserves sympathy in these troubled times than the clients these charities serve — the starving, sick, homeless, addicted, despairing and destitute.

I rephrased that because I'm not so sure that the various charities, nonprofits and tax-exempt organizations should escape scrutiny for how well or poorly they do their jobs. The popular assumption is that they are the epitome of goodness and kindness, so just lay off with the scrutiny stuff.

I disagree. They spend our money, whether our contributions (in cash and in kind) or our taxes. They have an obligation, to their clients and us, to operate effectively and efficiently, and not in the shadows created by cloaked financial reporting and apathetic or overly trusting boards of directors, all while blessing themselves with munificent salaries and benefits.

As one who sits on the Board of a 501(c)(3) organization, I completely agree with him.  Go read the whole thing, then be asking questions before you donate your time, goods or money to any philanthropic organization.  Even mine.
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Jimbo of the farookin' great hair and rockin' guitar gets the willies from crocs and gators.  I get the willies at just the description alone of Krokodil:

It is a drug for the poor, and its effects are horrific. It was given its reptilian name because its poisonous ingredients quickly turn the skin scaly. Worse follows. Oleg and Sasha have not been using for long, but Oleg has rotting sores on the back of his neck.

"If you miss the vein, that's an abscess straight away," says Sasha. Essentially, they are injecting poison directly into their flesh. One of their friends, in a neighbouring apartment block, is further down the line.

"She won't go to hospital, she just keeps injecting. Her flesh is falling off and she can hardly move anymore," says Sasha. Photographs of late-stage krokodil addicts are disturbing in the extreme. Flesh goes grey and peels away to leave bones exposed. People literally rot to death.

If that doesn't make your skin crawl, nothing will.
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While I'm on the subject of things that'll give me nightmares for days, there's this news:

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and National Jewish Health in Colorado both have issued a warning about nasal washes after two people have died from using tap water to do their sinus rinse.

Health experts say it’s safe to use nasal washes. It’s not about the rinse, it’s about the water. They warn that a mixture from a faucet could be fatal.

And just what kind of fatal?

Fornof says not to use tap water. It’s because of a brain-eating amoeba called Naegleria fowleri. It’s common in warm rivers and lakes, but if it travels up the nose to the brain it’s usually deadly

.Ooooo! Squicky, squicky, squicky!
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Not only does Siri have problems with thick Scottish accents, apparently she also struggles with Engrish:



And Siri is not the only iPhone app with language issues:

An autocorrected text message, accidentally sent to the wrong number, was the catalyst to a lockdown Wednesday at West Hall middle and high schools.

Just before noon, law enforcement and school officials issued the lockdown after a West Hall community member reported a threatening text message.

The text, saying "gunman be at west hall today," was received and reported to police around 11:30 a.m. But after police tracked the number, they learned the autocorrect feature on the new cellphone changed "gunna" to "gunman."

Yeesh!
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Quote of the Day:

There was no damage to the building, the spokeswoman added.

Thank goodness for small blessings, eh?
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According to Glenn Reynolds, today is "Blogger Appreciation Day."  To all my blogging pals out there, I do appreciate you.  I really do!

Quick Stops

Giggle of the Day:

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Three simple steps... to delete your Google browsing history.  Just do it.
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Ear Worm of the Day:



Yep. I've still got the Statler Brothers stuck between my ears... but it's Friday, and Jihad Gene once again exhorts us, "Let's Dance!"  Alrighty then.
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Drive-Bys

Hah! Google has backed down on tracking your data if you don't want them to:

Google Inc. (GOOG) will allow a “do-not-track” button to be embedded in its Web browser, letting users restrict the amount of data that can be collected about them.

Be on the lookout for this new button, as it's not out yet.
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Ear Worm of the Day:



Embedded in my ear since 8:50 a.m. Argh!
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Miss Nancy is a vile, wicked temptress!

Who Has Time...

... to blog when I'm having scintillating email conversations about said failure to post like the following?

Subject: Dilatory and Derelict

Mike: Seriously, now. Twelve days?

Me: Play closing weekend, sick, family obligations and work up to my eyebrows. Pffffllllbbbbbbbttt!

Mike: You put that tongue away, missy!

Me: Yeah? Sez who?

Mike: (Every response I could think of, suppressed.)

Me: *neener neener neener*

Mike: That's it, young lady. Go to your room!

Me: Make me. Nyaah nyaah nyaah!

Mike: And no dinner, either.

Me: That's okay -- I still have my pillowcase full of Halloween candy hidden under my bed. (So there.)

There -- I posted! Are you happy now?

From my travels on Sunday:


More to follow.
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What's going on with the U.S. military? Between this news...

"There’s no one in the Defense Department with his hand on the network switch. In fact, there is no one switch to speak of. The four branches of the U.S. armed forces each has a dedicated unit that, in theory, is supposed to handle cyber defense for the entire service. ... In practice, it’s not that simple."

... and this news...

"Specialist Chazray Clark was dying due to politics, and the Army and Air Force pilots are very angry about this. Chazray’s is not the only such case. Army medevac helicopters fall under the Medical Services Corps, who mark medevacs with red crosses. Officers will tell you face-to-face that the Medical Corps does not want to give up its helicopters because senior officers want their own helicopters to shuttle them from here to there."

... several heads in top brass should be rolling. Our troops deserve much, much better than this.
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Speaking of heads rolling, our Veep's should, also:

In Flint, Michigan, Vice President Joe Biden suggested that more rapes and murders could occur if President Barack Obama's jobs bill is not passed.

That's just unconscionable.
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If you're into photography at all, whether rank amateur or income-earning professional, you need to pay attention to this:

[S]ince the advent of Homeland Security and the heightened sense of vulnerability to terrorism, many LEOs have quote the 9/11 Law as reasons to ask photographers from making images in public places in completely legal venues. There is no such 9/11 Law that prevents a photographer from taking images. There are certain places where photography may be limited for national security (certain areas of military bases, certain areas of nuclear facilities) but trains, bridges and buildings are not on the list. But photographers have been arrested for taking images of all of these. Almost all the charges have eventually been dropped and some of the people are bringing suit for false arrest.

Go read the whole thing. That's just plain scary, folks.
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When she say's "mind-blowing," she ain't just whistling Dixie.
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When you break it down this way, those housekeeping chores don't look so daunting.
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Giggle of the Day:


see more ICHC After Dark

Drive-Bys

How major media in the U.S. reports the Occupy Wall Street mess:

So enthused about promoting the far-left protests, ABC anchor Diane Sawyer on Monday night's World News championed “the Occupy Wall Street movement” by ludicrously claiming that “as of tonight, it has spread to more than 250 American cities, more than a thousand countries -- every continent but Antarctica.”

How they look at it across the pond:

A very privileged protest: Wearing $300 jeans and from some of the most exclusive schools, the children of the one per cent out for a good time at Occupy Wall Street

Which do you suppose is the more unbiased reporting?
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A "rewind button" for blurry photos? Ooooo! Faster, please! (Yesterday, if I had my druthers.)
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Currently unemployed? Read this article (with an admittedly depressing title), for some good food for thought about how you may be sabotaging your own prospects... and what you can do to change.
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One of the things I love about fall is the return of squashes in great quantity in my local supermarket. This article not only has great descriptions of all the differing varieties, it also has some great recipes for a slow cooker soup and two different stuffed squashes. Yum!
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I was glad that Chris Christie declined to join the current presidential race because I honestly believe that he should at least finish his first full term in office before running for something else. Now that he's come out for Romney, I'm really glad he's not running... because it would have been more of the same thing Mitt's known for.
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Quote of the Day:

"If the candidates are smart, they'll make it be 5, 5, 5, 5, and more 5." -- Ann Althouse

Damn straight, Skippy.
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Teach your children?

With every passing hour, the meeting between Chicago Public Schools officials and the Chicago Teachers Union to discuss longer school days appears less likely.

Last week, CTU President Karen Lewis had said she and her union officers were ready to talk about the district's controversial plan, but suggested union headquarters as a meeting location.

CPS countered by suggesting the two parties meet at a school that has chosen to add 90 minutes to its school day.

And since then, the talks have stalled.

This morning, schools CEO Jean-Claude Brizard suggested Brown Elementary as a meeting site.

CPS officials have not heard back from CTU, said district spokeswoman Becky Carroll. CTU spokeswoman Stephanie Gadlin said she too does not know if a meeting will take place today.

It's called compromise or neutral territory, people, and you ought to learn how to find it. Both sides ought to be ashamed of themselves for the example they are setting for the very students they purport to care so much for.


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Giggle of the Day:


see more Lolcats and funny pictures, and check out our Socially Awkward Penguin lolz!

Weekend Rambles

When my pal the Norwegian from the North Woods comes for a visit, it's always a cultural whirlwind.

Yesterday:

• Long wander around the Chicago Botanic Garden, including a visit to the Model Railroad Garden (wonderful for kids big and small)
• Shokran, a fabulous Moroccan restaurant in the Old Irving Park neighborhood (If you go, be sure to order the Chicken Bastilla appetizer. Most yummy!)
• The Shadow of a Gunman at the Irish American Heritage Center
• Cocktails at Jimmy's -- a local Greek-owned restaurant

Today:

• Lunch at Jimmy's
• Drive into the city and park in the West Loop
• Walk from West Wacker Drive to East Wacker Drive and Michigan Avenue
• Walk down 3 flights of stairs to riverwalk level
• Attempt to take the Architectural Foundation 3 p.m. river tour
• Are informed that the next tickets available are for 9:30 a.m. tomorrow
• Walked back west along the river walk under the Michigan Avenue Bridge
• Stumble across the McCormick Bridgehouse & Chicago River Museum
• Develop buns of steel and thighs like Tina Turner by climbing to see all six levels of the bridgehouse museum, then climbing back down again
• Cool drinks and fruit plate at O'Brien's Riverwalk Cafe
• Up two flights of stairs to street level
• Back east, cross the bridge north and down two flights of stairs to the Wendella boat dock
• River and lakefront architectural tour
• More buns/thighs workout -- up two flights of stairs, through the middle of the Wrigley Building towards Trump Tower, back down three flights of stairs
• Take the Water Taxi to Chinatown (What a cool way to get there -- and cheap! $4/person to get from Michigan and the river to Chinatown. It would probably be close to $40 by taxi!)
• Dinner at Lao Shanghai (Try the most excellent... everything. There isn't a bad choice on the menu.)
• Red Line train to State & Lake
• Shorter than usual forced march to the parking lot
• Crazy GPS-directed trip home (if there was a long way to be found, it found it)

I love being a tourist in my own back yard-- especially with a good friend who is undaunted by my singular ability to drag him from pillar to post and back again.

Bus Fumes

Well... fumes, anyway, and lots of them: Grau tops any of my own recent bizarre dreams, hands down.

Drive-Bys

My friend with the farookin' fabulous heada hair gets freaked out by alligators and crocodiles. Me?

Authorities in a state in Brazil's northeast are scrambling to take the fright and the bite off the beach after piranhas sunk their teeth into about 100 beachgoers, UOL Noticias reported.

The problem -- rather fearsome given piranhas' horror-movie teeth and ability to sink them into human flesh -- has been the biggest at the main beach area in Piaui state; authorities said they need to act fast to reduce a piranha overpopulation situation.

Last weekend, at least 100 bathers were treated at the hospital in Jose de Freitas not far from Terezina, Piaui's capital, after being bitten on the heels or toes at the local beach.

Ay caramba!
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When I heard they'd signed Katherine Heigl to play Stephanie Plum, I knew One for the Money was going to be bad... but I had no idea it was going to be this bad:



Seriously, that's some of the worst casting since The Bridges of Madison County, which I also predicted would be awful, given the horrible miscasting of Eastwood and Streep.

Don't bother with the movie, but do get the book, which is hilarious.
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Get your hankies out for the winners of the American Humane Association's Hero Dog Awards.
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Looks like TOTUS has been dragged out of mothballs and plugged back in. Huzzah!

Drive-Bys

So... Dancing with the Stars, anyone?

This is the first season I've come into without any preconceived notions about who might be the one(s) to watch for the series. For me, there were some pleasant surprises and some downright disappointments. Here are my predictions for staying power:

The Best of the Men

• J.R. Martinez -- he's handsome, he's charming and he can dance.
• David Arquette -- surprisingly sweet, fully committed and shows lots of promise.
• Chaz Bono -- personality, musicality and pretty decent footwork.

The Best of the Ladies

• Chyna Phillips -- the appeal of Petra Nemcova - poise, sweetness and beautiful lines.
• Rikki Lake -- her waltz was flat-out gorgeous.
• Kristin Cavallari -- girlfriend can shake a bon-bon.

The Cloris Leachman Factor

• Carson Kressley -- he brings the crazy fun, but can he really dance?

The Meh (in no particular order)

• Hope Solo -- the judges loved her, but I thought she looked really awkward.
• Nancy Grace -- she has potential, but has to bust out her big personality more.
• Rob Kardashian -- again, he has potential, but where's the personality? the commitment?
  

Must. Go. Now.

• Ron Artest -- no rhythm, no grace, no footwork, nada. Metta Whirled Peas.
  
• Elizabetta Canallis -- no musicality, no grace, no footwork, zero personality. What was Clooney thinking?
  

So how did you stack them up?
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So Maurice Sendak has a long history of scaring little kids. What of it? Most little heathens love the thrill!

We're raising a generation of milksops, I think.
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Want to get a better handle on the GOP candidates for president? Go here for insight into what they want to do with our taxes.
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Webcam 101 for Seniors:



The Princess Mom would have been even more of a disaster and the language would have been much saltier.
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Quotes of the Day:

"It’s one small step for responsible journalism, one giant leap for celebrity look-alike dwarf porn."

Mercy.

" You may think the motorcycle makes you look cool and dangerous, but a Honda Odyssey minivan full of empty juiceboxes [sic] is a Destroying Angel Of Death by comparison."

You tell 'em, Insty!
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Giggle of the Day:


see more Lolcats and funny pictures, and check out our Socially Awkward Penguin lolz!