In Dreams

Okay, I'm seriously freaked out because this is the second night in a row my ex-husband has shown up in my dreams. I go years at a time not thinking about the guy (we've been divorced since 19809 (wishful thinking there for a moment...)), and all of a sudden he's in my head all night!

The night before last, I dreamed that we was back in New Hampshire and I was going back to work for the jerky lawyer I worked for many years ago. I knew it wouldn't work out, but was willing to take the job just so he could fire me. My line of thinking was that with the unemployment checks I could find a different place for the ex and I to live and to work out our problems.*

Argh!

Last night, I dreamed we were somewhere in Texas with a very large tour group. Our hotel was near a inland lake fed by a river. Because the ex had (in the dream, anyway -- I don't know if he really does or not) COPD, he lagged behind everyone else, and we were constantly late for tours, meals, meetings. The final straw for me was missing another group meal and almost missing the tour bus for another tour, which I decided I didn't really want to go on anyway.

Hungry and peeved, I opted to skip the tour and go for a walk to find somewhere local to find something to eat. As I wandered, I climbed winding streets lined with elaborate Victorian brick homes in the hills above the town.

After a long stroll I came upon my grandson sitting naked on a lawn, and bent to pick him up. I knew I needed to get him back to the hotel, but I was totally turned around and couldn't find my way back. I figured out that I needed to keep the water from the river to my right at all times in order to eventually end up where we needed to be. I had to stop from time to time to amuse the grandson to keep him from crying. We came to a main highway where I could see the lake in the distance.

I suddenly realized that I had my cell phone in my purse and looked for a street sign so I could identify our location and call the ex for a ride back. I looked up, and there was a sign for a town called Querco.**

Then I woke up.

Two things -- I wander around a lot in my dreams... and I wish the ex would get out of my dreams.

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*It should be noted that I've never collected unemployment compensation, and I've never, ever wanted to be fired. I have no idea where that came from.

**For what it's worth, there is a district called Querco. It's in Peru.
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Update: Yikes! Last night he showed up in not one, but three different dreams, in the last of which I was trying to get away from him, hiding and he found me -- which led to me shrieking and yelling, "No, no, NO!" in my dream, which promptly woke me. I was terrified for a minute there that I might have actually talked (yelled) in my sleep.

I haven't had dreams quite this unsettling since the last time I was on the patch. I sure hope whatever it is that's rattling around the shadows of my psyche works itself out -- and soon.