Bus Fumes

You've probably seen all the to-do about Roland Burris and whether or not he perjured himself when giving testimony in the Blagoviator's impeachment trial.

Everyone else wants to know why it took three affidavits, all filed very quietly and after the impeachment trial was long over, to get his story straight.

That's not what I want to know.

I want to know why on day one of his testimony at the impeachment trial he didn't give an opening statement saying something like,

"Ladies and gentlemen, before you begin your questions, I'd like to make an opening statement. For the record, I was contacted numerous times after Mr. Blagoviator's indictment and prior to this action by a number of people on Mr. Blagoviator's staff regarding my interest in becoming the next junior senator of the great state of Illinois. Those people are X, X, X and X. During at least one of these conversations, Mr. Blagoviator's brother requested a campaign donation in the amount of $10,000.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I said no to his request in no uncertain terms.

"Furthermore, ladies and gentlemen, much as I wanted the position of junior senator from the Great State of Illinois, I immediately hauled ass down to the federal prosecutor's office and revealed the date, time and specifics of said conversation.

"Ladies and gentlemen, having cooperated fully with the federal prosecutor, I figured I had completed my duty to both the great state of Illinois and the United States of America, and I still really, really, really wanted to become the next junior senator from the great state of Illinois, so when the Blagoviator offered the appointment, I accepted with a clear conscience (and not a little bit of glee) and made an immediate appointment with the stone mason to carve the new title into my crypt.

"Now, you have questions for me?"

Nothing less is acceptable, and it's horse hockey to say that he didn't have time to answer any or all of the questions put to him fully. It's moose puckey to drag your attorney to a press conference and consult with him before you answer questions rightfully asked.

You are a disgrace, Mr. Burris. Shame.