Traffic Report

Do NOT get between me and the elevator at 11:30 a.m. or you might just get flattened.

This giving up breakfast for Lent is a dangerous thing.

That is all.

Traffic Conditions

The evening commute in Chicago ought to be just ducky tonight:

A National Weather Service winter weather advisory that predicts 3 to 5 inches of snow is in effect in the Chicago area and northwest Indiana beginning at 6 p.m. this evening until 9 a.m. Friday.

Locally higher amounts are possible, according to the National Weather Service.

In any case, enough snow should fall in Chicago to break the February snowfall record of 27.8 inches set 115 years ago in 1896. So far, exactly 27 inches have been recorded at O'Hare International Airport, the official reporting station.

Accumulations late this evening may exceed an inch an hour, the weather service said, adding that gusting winds of 25 mph may produce areas of blowing and drifting snow, reducing visibility to under a half mile at times. Driving conditions may become treacherous and snow removal difficult.

Oh. Goody.

In Case You're Interested...

... Yes. I'm actually going HOME tonight.

I'm just hoping all the sidewalks are shoveled between the train station and my house!

Traffic Alert

If you're anywhere in the Midwest and don't have to drive today, STAY HOME.

Wicked blizzard winds continue to take their toll this morning, with hundreds of cars still stranded, many major roads closed and Metra shutting down five lines and running Sunday schedules on the rest.

As the National Weather Service put it: "Crippling and potentially killer blizzard to continue to this morning."

Seriously, I can hardly make out the building across the street, and it's a high-rise.

Not that bad, you say?

The forecast calls for 2 to 5 inches more this morning, with high winds continuing into the afternoon, at times gusting to 40 mph. Total accumulations will be in the 12- to 18-inch range over north central Illinois and the 15- to 24-inch range in the Chicago area, the weather service said.

I'm not kidding about not driving.

On Lake Shore Drive, firefighters checked dozens of vehicles, shining flashlights inside to check on any motorists. As of 6:30 a.m., fire officials said anyone who wanted to be rescued from their cars had been. Both directions of the Drive remained closed as cars were towed away.

In Kane County, snowmobiles were used to reach people stranded along a stretch of road near Hampshire. Will County officials said they were having problems reaching stuck motorists.

Most of those people who are stuck have been there since about 6:00 p.m. yesterday.

Don't be a moron and wait for the City, Town or County to close roads. We've had more than our fair share of warnings about how bad this would be. Metra has shut down some lines and moved to a Sunday schedule on others. CTA buses are running, but you're going to wait a long time for one, and it'll take you a long time to get to your destination. Seriously -- stay home.

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Update: If you were one of those folks rescued off of Lake Shore Drive last night, call "311" and they'll tell you where your car was towed to. Also, let them know if you ran out of gas and the city will send a truck to help you.

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Ooooo! They're now predicting up to 25 inches of snow here in the city!

PSA

A little tip I read about today that I thought I'd share:

If your car has had any work done, you should check to make sure the hood is properly closed [before you drive it out of the shop or off the lot].

Yikes!

The Road Ahead

Glah! The National Weather Service says:

COMBINED SNOW TOTALS FROM THE MONDAY AFTERNOON THROUGH WEDNESDAY MAY EXCEED A FOOT AND A HALF ACROSS MUCH OF NORTHERN ILLINOIS AND FAR NORTHWEST INDIANA. SNOWFALL RATES UP TO 3 INCHES PER HOUR WILL BE PROBABLE AT THE HEIGHT OF THE STORM TUESDAY NIGHT.

THE STORM SYSTEM WILL BE AFFECTING A LARGE PORTION OF THE SOUTHERN GREAT LAKES...MIDWEST AND OHIO VALLEY REGIONS. ANYONE WITH TRAVEL PLANS TUESDAY AND WEDNESDAY...INCLUDING THOSE TRAVELING THROUGH CHICAGO OHARE AND MIDWAY AIRPORTS...SHOULD CONTINUE TO MONITOR LATER FORECASTS REGARDING THE DEVELOPMENT OF THIS WINTER STORM.

Batten down the hatches, kids! (As for me, I'm headed to the oral surgeon on Tuesday afternoon. Say a little prayer for me, will you?)

Drive-Bys

Add this to my ridiculous Xmas/birthday/whatever wish list. Luge and skeleton are among my favorite winter Olympic sports, so this little doohickey has a lot of appeal.

Besides -- it's recommended ages 5 & up. (I qualify, I think.)

Given that it doesn't have wheels or blades, I might even make it to the bottom of the hill without killing myself. Either way, it looks like it'd be fun.
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If you've got a teen who's about to get his/her first driver's license, you might want to switch to American Family Insurance, which has a great plan to offer you:

Nora and John Suter said they trusted their son, but they didn't want to take their eyes off him completely as he sped off with his friends into a particularly risky phase of teen independence: the first year of driving.

Thanks to American Family Insurance's Teen Safe Driver program, they found a solution: The Suters installed a video camera just above the rearview mirror of the Mustang. It keeps a running tab of Tyler's every erratic driving move.

I wouldn't have thanked my parents for this, but I didn't have cell phones, iPods or any electronic distraction except the radio when I first started to drive.

Thanks to American Family Insurance's Teen Safe Driver program, they found a solution: The Suters installed a video camera just above the rearview mirror of the Mustang. It keeps a running tab of Tyler's every erratic driving move.

Alas, there have been many. Like the time Tyler floored the gas to pass a friend's pickup in a subdivision.

"I looked up and saw the (recording) light, and I knew I was busted," he said.

Then there was the time Tyler nearly rear-ended a car at a stop sign, or when he gassed the car into a right-hand turn to catch up with a friend. Thanks to two lenses, the camera simultaneously captured what was going on inside and in front of the car.

Nora Suter watched the videos on a laptop in the family's kitchen. "Tyler, do you see how dangerous this could be? A child could run out on the street, and you'd have no time to stop."

Sounds like it would ensure your teen knew when he/she was being watched and give you both plenty to discuss, as well.
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This is a great list of what to do if you've had a pet escape or wander off. Print yourself a copy and tuck it in a drawer.

Here are some tips for finding a lost cat or dog from experts at the Anti-Cruelty of Chicago, PAWS Chicago, Feline Friends Chicago and the Citizens for Animal Protection:

† Act immediately. The longer you wait, the farther your pet can travel. Plus, the chances of your pet getting injured increases.

† Leave items with a familiar scent outside your home. A litter box, pet bed or a shirt or shoes recently worn by the pet owner can attract a pet who has strayed.

† Search the neighborhood. Walk, ride a bicycle or drive slowly through your neighborhood several times each day. Whistle a few times, then call your pet’s name twice. Listen carefully and look around.

† Your pet may be injured, frightened or trapped and unable to come to you. Hearing your voice may encourage your pet to answer you. After you call the pet’s name two or three times, remain in one place long enough to see if you can hear your pet.

† A lost pet may hide during the day, so go out again at night through your neighborhood with a flashlight and call for your cat or dog.

† Ask neighbors, letter carriers and delivery people, anyone you see, if they have seen your pet.

† Post flyers at intersections within a two-mile radius of the area of where your pet was lost. Also, give flyers to local grocery stores, community centers, pet stores, veterinary offices, churches and laundromats.

† The flyers should have a photograph of the pet and how to reach you as well as provide information such as fur color, breed and eye color.

† Advertise in local and community newspapers.

† Visit all local animal shelters and animal-control agencies as well as call or e-mail them. Your pet could show up at any time.

† File a lost pet report with every shelter in the city and suburbs. Check with the shelters every few days.

† If your pet was lost anywhere near a highway, contact the area’s department of transportation.

† Call veterinary hospitals.

† Do not send reward money or offer information to anyone claiming they have your pet.

† File a lost pet report with the Chicago Police Department.

I hope you never need it, but it's a great resource if or when you do.
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Ear Worm of the Day:



I have no idea why this has been stuck in my head, but it's been there since last night.
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Giggle of the Day:

Traffic Alert

Yes, it's going to feel like the frozen tundra here later this evening:

A sprawling mass of intensely cold air draped across Canada and interior Alaska---and the source of the Midwest's predicted chill--- has strengthened over the past week. Readings Thursday were as much as 30-degrees colder than a week ago. A cross-polar jet stream has infused the cold air there with a supply of even colder Siberian air. Daybreak Thursday readings dipped to 47-below at Fort Yukon, Alaska and to 49-below at Dawson in Canada's Yukon Territory.

What arrives Thursday night and Friday morning on gusty northwest winds is but a lobe of cold air off that vast wintry reservoir of air. If there's one piece of good news which accompanies the cold blast, it's that the chill is to hit hard for a day and a half then back off, giving way to a more moderate brand of cold air this weekend. But, while its stay here is to be comparatively brief, the near 0-degree low temperature predicted at O'Hare is to be accompanied by 15 to 20 mph sustained winds likely to generate dangerous wind chills under 20-below---and potentially as low as 30-below in a few of colder locations north and northwest of the city. Winds will diminish quickly Friday and the cloud increase predicted in the afternoon and evening is to occur as a flood of "milder" air runs up and over the retreating bitter chill. This is to lead to light snow amid rising temperatures Friday night and to a rebound into the upper teens to around 20 Saturday and to the mid 20s with east winds off Lake Michigan supporting possible snow flurries Sunday.

Yowza!

Make sure you're bundled up before you go outside, and that you've got footwear with good traction. Salt doesn't melt ice at these temps, and loads of sidewalks are frozen over right now. In addition, this is frostbite weather, and it's nothing to fool with.

Ear Worm of the Day?

Traffic Alert

Cool Fact of the Day:

As the storm swept north, the National Weather Service reported that there was snow on the ground in every state except Florida. That included Hawaii, which had 7 inches on the top of the Mauna Kea mountain.

How cool is THAT??? (Oops. I forgot. Blame it on Global Warming.)



Ear Worm of the Day:

PSA

I hate to say "I told you so" when it comes to this:

Deaths stemming from train-vehicle collisions and pedestrian accidents at public railroad crossings in Illinois increased last year, safety officials said Tuesday.

The 17 fatalities reported between January and November last year at Illinois rail crossings, and 10 deaths of pedestrians hit by trains, reversed a recent decline in collisions, according to statistics compiled by the Illinois Commerce Commission.

But I did tell you so.

Share this video with your friends and family, will you?

Rules of the Road

If you're not used to driving in snow, sleet or ice, (and even if you are) take a moment and read this whole article on what to do and what not to do when driving in bad weather.

I'm convinced that every moron with a set of keys waits for bad weather and then goes out to practice for the Indy 500.

PSA

Swiped from the Advice Goddess, this is very good advice indeed:

If you insist on making at least one New Year's resolution, let it be to watch this video.

Traffic Alert

How's my day going?



And yours?

Bus Fumes

You know, I really wish they'd stop calling them "pat downs" -- because they're not. From Dictionary.reference.com:

pat-down   
[pat-doun] Show IPA
–noun
an act or instance of passing the hands over the body of a clothed person to detect concealed weapons, drugs, etc.; frisking.

In reality, from recent personal experience, TSA agents don't just pass their hands over your body -- they grope you, and hard in the manner of Dictionary.reference.com's definition #6:

Slang . an act or instance of sexually fondling another person.

I also take issue with TSA's promise of privacy and that no pictures will be taken:

The U.S. Marshals Service recently admitted saving some 35,000 images from a machine at a federal courthouse in Florida. TSA says that will never happen. Human experience says, oh, yes, it will.

Here's all the proof I need that your parts can and may be exposed to the rest of the world: this CNN article photo. This quick Bing image search. Repeated photos from the scanners on Drudge Report banners. This quick google image search. Also, this Fox News report that shows images of not only the scanned image, but also identifiable images of the person scanned:

Sure, the TSA assures us that the image-saving capability "will be turned off" in these scanners, but they don't say when, and they don't say what has been or will be done with the gazillion images already saved.

Then there's this YouTube video describing the "pat down" for an "opt out":

Even if you agree to the scan, you still aren't out of the woods. I didn't opt out, and still got the so-called pat down, thanks to my bra's underwires.* The young lady in the video at least got groped in private. I got my breasts squeezed and twisted in full view of every single person in the security area -- and no, nobody offered to take me off into private to do it.

(Please don't tell me it's okay because I submitted. I had no choice. Neither did anyone else in line that morning, as we were all forced through the scanners or to submit to a pat-down if we wanted to fly that day.)

I'm a mature adult who's seen a lot, and still this was a humiliating experience for me. Imagine, then, if it's your grandmother or wife or teenager or tween or very young child who's always been told never to let a stranger touch them inappropriately. Whether its the public chest mauling or the full body scan or the private full body feel-up, it's wrong on just about every level.

Furthermore, the new procedures really slowed the security line down at O'Hare. Don't be even a little late for a flight, or these new procedures will likely make you miss your flight. And be prepared for gridlock at airport security if you're traveling over the Thanksgiving holiday.

Neither of these forms of screening should be used until or unless there's a suspicion that a passenger may be carrying contraband of some sort. It should not be the primary screening method unless it's used for all airline passengers -- including the Head of Homeland Security, the President, the First Lady and the First Children. The TSA has gone way too far.

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*The least the TSA could do is educate their screeners as to what an underwire looks like and why it's not a threat to national security.

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Update: I've heard a lot of discussion on talk radio about this subject today, and a lot of people who experienced the old "pat down" with the back of the hands that came if you made the metal detector beep more than once or had a medical note due to surgical pins, rods, plates or replacement joints saying that TSA agents were "respectful" and that "it's not that bad" and that they were given a choice for their pat down to happen publicly or privately.

Trust me, things have changed. I can't wait to hear about your next experience with the TSA. That was then. This is now, and it's different.

Also, I just heard a United Airline employee assert that NONE of the airline food service truck personnel or bag handlers have to go through security of any type at O'Hare "because they're TSA employees." But pilots and flight attendants do have to submit to those indignities.

There's no logical reason why this is so.

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Update II:

If this photo from today's (11/15/10) Drudge Report doesn't convince you of the outrageousness of the TSA's procedures, nothing else will:



(And for those people who insist that they do the full feel-ups in private, this disproves it.)

Hey, Big Sis! How's that discreet thing supposed to work again?

Laying Rubber

How close do I live to O'Hare International Airport?

I awoke with a start at 5:02 a.m., realized my alarm hadn't gone off and still made my 6:00 a.m. flight.

God bless 303 Taxi!

(I have no clue what I shoved in my suitcase other than clean undies, socks and a toothbrush...)

Stormy Weather

Holy smokes! The headlines from this morning? "Great Lakes Cyclone" expected to hit Chicago area and Storm front spawns brief tornado warning in Kane.

WGN Radio says we expect 30' to 35' waves on Lake Michigan today, and winds gusting up to 60 miles per hour. They also inform us that umbrellas are useless.

There has already been one ground stop order at O'Hare airport (oops! there goes another one!), and, if you're travelling here over the next couple of days, you should count on more.

If driving, motorists are urged to keep both hands on the wheel and slow down, the Naperville release said. Drivers are cautioned to keep a safe distance from cars in adjacent lanes, and to take extra care in vehicles with high profiles, such as trucks and SUVs.

Oh. And monsoon type rain just blew in.

I can't wait to go to work today.


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Update: Yes, I made it in to work. Tornadoes have touched down in a bunch of places here in the Midwest. In addition, the skydeck at the Willis (SEARS) Tower pulled in the ledges and shut down for at least the day AND this poor woman was impaled with the business end of a falling branch.

Gadzooks.

Rules of the Road

1. Get OFF the phone:

[A]lthough many people now agree that driving while on a cell phone can be dangerous, they think the rules should apply to those other drivers -- not themselves. A University of Utah study found that 97.5 percent of the population does not have the ability to multitask in the manner required to talk on the phone and drive safely. The rare group who can might make good fighter pilots.

"The big problem is that people think they're in that 2.5 percent," said Smith. "Unless you're 'Top Gun,' you can't do it."

The problem is not caused by holding a phone -- people don't drive less safely because they have a stick shift, Smith noted. The problem is a phenomenon called "inattention blindness," which means you can be looking straight out the windshield and not see what's in front of you because your brain is elsewhere. Many drivers who have been in cell-phone related crashes said they didn't see that the light was red, Smith said.

"Their brain is task-switching, instead of multi-tasking," said Smith. Drivers using cell phones look but fail to see up to half the information in their driving environment, according to Dave Strayer, an author of the Utah study. Talking with a passenger is different, because a passenger can point out hazards and stop talking if driving conditions change.

2. If you're tired, pull over, turn the car off and take a nap:

Andy Dangerfield had been on his way college after an early start when he nodded off at the wheel.

He careered into the centre of Interstate 90 in Montana and straight into a metal guardrail which speared through the engine of his Chevy Suburban.

Before he could slow the station wagon, it had passed through and exited via the rear window - missing his body by inches.

3. In Illinois you are required to stop for pedestrians anywhere there is a marked crosswalk, even if there is no stop sign:

Chicago police have gone on a ticketing blitz focusing on dozens of high-accident locations to enforce a new state law requiring drivers to stop for pedestrians in crosswalks.

The law, which took effect this summer yet remains little-known among the public, is all about improving safety and reducing crashes involving pedestrians, officials said....

From neighborhoods to congested business districts, the two-month-old crosswalk law is intended to create a sweeping change in the rules of the road pertaining to pedestrian safety by clarifying drivers' responsibility and making it clear-cut for police to ticket violators, authorities said.

The former crosswalk law in Illinois required drivers to yield to pedestrians and stop only when necessary.

Now, drivers must stop for pedestrians in all crosswalks — even those that are unmarked or don't have a stop sign or a traffic signal. The penalty for failing to stop is a traffic citation of $50 to $500. Fines vary by county.

The new law also applies to instances in which a pedestrian enters the crosswalk against a "Don't Walk" signal or a red light, just as the old law required drivers to yield in such cases, officials said.

Fun, huh? (Having been hit by a taxi while crossing an intersection on a green light with a walk signal, I can tell you that no one is going to obey this law unless the tickets fly fast and furious and without end.)

4. Curb Your Dog. I totally agree with Zorn that this woman was the victim and not the perpetrator:

Those who don't pick up after their dogs deserve nothing less than a little frontier poop justice.

Update:

5. Don't Drink and Drive:

A Crest Hill man died early Tuesday in a crash near southwest suburban Lockport....

Angus would not comment as of 7:15 a.m. on whether or not alcohol was a factor, but did say Mahalik’s driver’s license was revoked for DUI in the past.

Act like a future Darwin Award Winner and you'll more than likely get your wish. (Just ask Jake if you don't believe me.)

Rules of the Road

Rule No. 1:

If you're at the wheel of a moving vehicle and have to vomit, pull over and put the vehicle in park and then puke.

Rule No. 2:

Train beats car every freaking time.

Yes, that's my train station. No, I didn't go to work today, or I'd have actually witnessed this.

What an incredibly foolish waste of a life.

Drive-Bys

The novel I've been working on forever?

I write like
J. D. Salinger

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

My blogging, on the other hand?

I write like
Ian Fleming

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Personally, I think that thing doesn't work. Either that, or I'm a brilliant but darned eccentric writer.

(Blame Mrs. Who.)
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Transformers 3 Update: They're taking over Michigan Avenue tomorrow. If you were planning a shopping day or figured you'd take the direct route and cut off Lake Shore Drive... think again.
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Ear Worm of the Day:



Where in the heck did that one come from? It's been stuck in my noggin since noon!
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Another bus driver I'd be proud to call friend.
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A couple of Blogthings, because I haven't done them in a while:

You Are Observant

You are an insightful and wise person. You like to think things through carefully, and you usually come up with amazing ideas. Some people may think you're boring, but they don't realize how much you're learning through careful observation. By moving slowly, you are able to really see and appreciate every detail in life. You have a vivid and complete picture of the world. Your intelligence runs deep. Anyone who takes time to talk with you is eventually overwhelmed by your brilliance.

The Sand and Surf Test

Blogthings: We're Not Shrinks, But We Play Them On the Internet

And...

Your Brain is Complex

Your mind is a multi dimensional wonderland, with many layers. You're the type that always has multiple streams of thoughts. And you can keep these thoughts going at any time. You're very likely to be engaged in deep thought - and deep conversation.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

Blogthings: Take a Quiz. Annoy Your Friends.

Road Conditions

Oh, joy!

Dear Tenants,

The National Weather Service has issued the following weather warning & information for our area:

Severe Thunderstorms Expected, High Winds and Hail Possible

Strong thunderstorms are expected to arrive in the city between 4:00 and 7:00pm. The storms have the possibility of damaging winds and large hail. Depending on how the storms develop, winds could reach 70 mph. To view live weather radar, follow this link to: National Weather Service Radar.

Please disseminate this information to your employees and take the necessary precautions.

That ought to make the commute home interesting. (And it's the second time in a week, thank you very much.)

Around here every idiot who should never have received a drivers license, much less a set of car keys, inevitably picks weather like this to drive in.

Be careful on your way home, will you?
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Update:

Tornado Watch Issued - Severe Thunderstorms Expected, High Winds and Hail Possible

From the National Weather Service:

A tornado watch has been issued for Cook County until 9:00 PM.

A severe thunderstorm is expected to hit the North Central area of Illinois near Rockford between 2:00 and 5:00pm. Chicago will have approximately 30 minutes advance notice before the storm strikes here somewhere between 4:00 and 7:00pm.

The storm will be fast moving and may only last 30-45 minutes. It will be accompanied by 70 mph winds, hail (the size of a quarter) and heavy rains. The rainfall is expected to be 1-2 inches per hour. The heat index is expected to reach 100 degrees this evening (as well as on Sat and Sun). This storm will be very similar to the one that came through last Friday.

Yippee!

I wasn't kidding -- be careful on your way home!

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Update: Another first -- tornado sirens just went off. I've been working in and around the Loop since 1989, an it's the first time I've ever heard that.