Leslie's Omnibus

From the Rowdies in the Back of the Bus


The Sweetheart of Shell Knob, MO wants you to know...

In these serious times it is important for all of us, of all faiths, to recognize these four Religious Truths:

1. Muslims do not recognize Jews as God's chosen people.

2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.

3. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian world.

4. Presbyterians do not recognize each other at Hooters

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I'll bet this guy could do a dandy photo illustration of just how this might have happened:




















(Thanks, Elizabeth! I giggle myself silly over this.)
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Elizabeth sends these for my friend Mort:

Montgomery Epstein was taking an oral examination. He was asked to spell "cultivate," and he did so correctly.

"But do you know what the word means?" asked the teacher. "Can you use it in a sentence?"

For a moment Montgomery looked puzzled. Then he brightened up and said, "Last vinter on a very cold day, I was vaiting for a streetcar. But it was too cultivate, so I took the subvay."

I went to the bank the other day...I asked the banker to check my balance...so she pushed me!

What did the Jewish bank teller say to her customers? "You never write, you never call, you only visit when you need money."

Hear about the new synagogue in Harlem? It's called Temple Beth-You-Is-My-Woman-Now.
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Update: I knew it was too funny to be true... but still...















Oh, well... my colleague Hattie, who brought this to my attention, also notes that there is a blog just bursting with hoaxey factoids.
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Leslie

1 comment:

KeesKennis said...

Hi,
Thanks for the link.
I will try and do something with http://www.velociworld.com/, which appears as a dwarflike being, and a crocodile.

It is supposed to say Vman
I am such a klutz.