Drive-Bys

It's a trifecta of man vs. train within the past 24 hours:

• One guy on the Pink Line during rush hour (try 'splaining to St. Peter that you met your end on the pink line);
• One guy in San Antonio in the wee hours who traumatized an engineer, but at least didn't screw up rush hour; and,
• A stupid teen who might just get lucky and pull through despite his best efforts to the contrary.

I shudder to think what the totals for man v. train will be here in Chicago by year's end.
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The hippiest, dippiest joint in Chicago appears to be in financial trouble:

The Heartland's financial problems are varied. Some might blame the service or the food. (I like the food.) [I do, too -- especially the fried brown rice.] The bigger problem, James and Hogan say, is the recession. Paying bills with money they didn't have, they accumulated huge overdraft charges. Their bank won't give them credit. Big city license fees are due.

"It's the first time someone could say 'You're not living within your means,'" Hogan said. "It's taken us close to two years to ..."

"Get it," James said.

They get it now. They've made changes they hope will help. And they're hoping that the same trust and instincts that made them shake hands on a far-fetched deal 34 years ago will get them through again.

I hope they do learn the lesson, because that place is a gem. In fact, this song pretty much sums it up:


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Don't blame the mobile phone -- blame the inconsiderate assholes who think their time is more valuable than yours. (And if a friend does it to you more than once, they're not a very good friend.)
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The first in a series of laws designed to completely eradicate smoking and tobacco use in Finland came into effect Friday, including possible prison sentences for selling cigarettes to minors.

Finland is the first country in the world to write into its legislation that it intends not just to reduce smoking but to end all tobacco use through law.

Actually, my argument all along here has been that if it's not illegal to sell them or smoke them, it's pretty hard to say you can smoke them here but you can't smoke them there. Pretty smart, those Finns...
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Seeing "pink testicle" at first glance here, instead of "pink tentacle" means I should think about getting my eyes checked, right? (And not that my Freudian slip is hanging down a mile...)


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What are we heading for here? Oh... maybe this:

Most families who are due to lose their child benefit are worrying about how they'll make ends meet without it.

But for Kelly Marshall, who has five children by four different fathers, the handout has never been about paying for nappies, food and other everyday expenses.

She saved her benefit money to help pay for breast enhancement.

And as many parents envisage tightening their belts after the Tories announced plans to cut the benefit for higher-rate taxpayers, she plans to save more of hers for liposuction and a tummy tuck.

Fasten your seat belts. I predict that attitude will find it's way across "The Pond" soon, if it hasn't done so already.
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Drive-Bys

Ear Worm and Great Big Grin of the Day:

Kids and a sprinkler and a sunny day -- always a recipe for fun.

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Button-Buster of the Day:

"Holy Cow! I just got assigned my first attempted murder case. Craziness."

That's my kid -- taking names and kicking ass. I am so proud of her!

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Mayor Shortshanks proposes bar carts at the gates of O'Hare and Midway and extending all terminal restaurants with bar service and the carts to 24 hour days, making this brilliant proposal on the same day a Chicago-bound flight is diverted to Denver to rid itself of a drunken and disorderly passenger. (Ah, well -- they'll be somebody else's nightmare, not ours. La la la!)

I won't list all the obvious arguments against this -- others will do it better.

I will note, however, that I expect the airlines will be thrilled with the possibility of losing in flight sales and control over what and how much a flyer is served if you can buy a six pack or slam a bunch of shots, or dump half a dozen cocktails into the empty water bottle you've brought along for just that purpose and carry them right onto the plane, just like you can bottled water or soda?

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Speaking of genius-level thought processes, Speaker Pelosi says the way to create jobs is to keep paying people unemployment.

Right.

We've seen article after article here in Illinois and also news from Detroit showing that people refuse to take jobs that pay near the same rate as their unemployment benefit because it's more convenient to just sit home and wait for more and let the government pay them to do it. Then we get peeved when illegal aliens take those same jobs that those living off the government teat are turning up their noses at.

Explain to me how this is creating jobs??? Ooo! Except for the government jobs created to deal with all those unemployment benefits.

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Why I read Ken Levine... and all his comments? First go read Ken's post on how the National Anthem should be sung. It's a thing of absolute beauty.

Then turn your attention to commenter Bevo at that same post, who displays all that is wrong in higher education today and pile on, please.

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Giggle of the Day:

Beginning to end, it's a scream!
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Update: I actually have some appetite today and managed to eat half a sandwich and most of a cup of soup at Panera (I had to walk the couple of blocks to my local grocery store because I had nothing in the house to eat... but since I've eaten almost nothing since Friday night, I stopped there first lest I end up with the shakes). This feels huge. My tastebuds and appetite are completely verfarkled, and normal favorites make me blanch, while things I haven't contemplated eating in years -- liked canned pears, icy cold from the fridge -- have a lot of appeal. Really plain stuff is okay. Turkey. White bread. Mayonnaise. I went a little wild and bought a box of pasta salad mix. Since I was picking so much high food value items, I tossed in a box of all fruit popsicles. That should hold me for the next few days.

I'm still coughing, hacking and wheezing up half a gallon of big green and yellow loogies a day, and my ribs are feeling it. That's on the negative side. On the positive, I'm less achy and a little more focused.

Baby steps, folks. I'm making baby steps.

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One More Thing:

I agree with most people that the vuvuzela is one of the more pernicious assaults on the ears I've heard in a long, long time... which is exactly why I donated money to pay for this creative use of the same:

Adam Quirk, the founder of Wreck & Salvage art video collection, started a campaign on kickstarter.com, raising dough to play 100 vuvuzelas outside BP Headquarters in London for an entire day in an attempt to encourage the company to get a move on cleaning up the oil spill.

Yes, he's met his goal, but why stop at 100?

Let 'em literally hear how pissed we are!