Drive-Bys

Excuse me while I gloat.

Ready?

It's time for a little Dance of Joy:



(There. I feel better now.)
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Important things pinging around my brain today:

1. Never order fajitas in Ireland. They contain no green pepper. Very little red pepper. No onions. Celery. The marinade usually involves generous lashings of both duck sauce and sweet chili sauce. It's nothing like you'd get here in the states. Trust me.
2. In fact, the only American dishes you're safe ordering in Ireland are hamburgers and cheeseburgers.
   
3. The bartender will look at you like you've got three heads if you order a French beer in Ireland. Got it?
   
4. Heck, the only American beers you're likely to run across in Ireland are Budweiser (on tap), Coors Light (on tap and bottle) and Miller Genuine Draft (bottle only).
   
5. Why in the world would you order an American beer in Ireland when you could have Guinness? or Smithwick's? or Rebel Red? And if you don't like any of those, have a Bulmer's cider. (P.S. -- If the bartender offers you Murphy's stout, you've offended him or he thinks you're an eejit.)
   
6. My office is three blocks from Sears Tower, and our new office manager is beginning to understand my compulsion to get an emergency evacuation plan in place. I'm kind of really compulsive about having such a plan in place (and we haven't had one since we moved in here last July). Gee. I wonder why?
7. If you order Irish Stew, it's going to have lamb in it. Just deal with it, or don't order the Irish Stew.
8. This is news? Anyone with half a brain knows that. (And if you meet someone who doesn't know or doesn't believe it? Run! Run away!)
   
9. Again, no Hulu after midnight.
10. It must be The Change, because all of a sudden I have a ravenous sweet tooth. Every day. (Scarey, from the chick that normally could live on anything salty, fat-laden and/or sour, preferably all rolled into the same foodstuff.)
11. Paddy is an Irish whiskey, as is Power's. Paddy Power's is an Irish bookie. Got that straight?
12. Don't ask an Irish bartender for a Presbyterian Cocktail. There are no Presbyterians in Ireland (or so few you'd be more likely to find the proverbial pot of gold first). Ask a Scotsman. At least he can point you towards the kirk.
    
13. The only bourbon whiskey you'll find in most Irish bars is Jack Daniels Black. And since Jack is from Tennessee and not Kentucky, it's not bourbon.
    

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Giggle of the Day:


see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Because it reminds me of Nick Digilio's favorite commercial:



But remember --


see more dog and puppy pictures
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Is it me, or has there been a harmonic convergence of fame whores in the news lately?

For example, this wronged wife and her opposite -- the jilted lover, both of whom should have kicked the bastard to the curb long ago. (But I luuuurrrrrrrrrrrrve him! Blech.)

These two idiots, who deserve one another, even though their eight children deserve better than either of them.

Oh, no! More chav wannabes slag each other.

The princess of daytime bombast expounding on the important little things in life. (And I've met, had cocktails and danced with one of her pilots, who described her private jets to me. Luxe, indeed.)

And the biggest, flamingest fame whore of all is about to start flapping his gums again. Bastard.

Finally, there's the Queen of All Media, who I will not link, who chose to stir up the Miss USA pageant with his own personal political agenda. (Note: I am all for legal (secular) unions for all, and marriage (religious) within churches, dependent upon whether an individual church chooses to do so at all. Proposition 8 has nothing to do with the Miss USA pageant, Your Bitchiness.)

Is it something in the water?
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They tax cigarettes and booze -- why not tax soft drinks? Heck, throw in any caffeinated products, too. At least it spreads the sin taxes around more evenly.
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