Drive-Bys

What's the sweetest item not on the menu at Sweets & Savories?

A peek-a-boo playing Mr. Monkey Toes, of course! (Our brunch there was fantastic, by the way -- great food, lovely ambiance, very good value.)

Mr. Monkey Toes and Mommy play with Ziggy the skunk and Dot the ladybug. Yes, I've started him out early on theatre, and he loved every second of it. Chicago Children's Theatre is terrific fun for kids of all ages.
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Why don't I try online dating?

Within minutes of filling out my profile, e-mails with comments such as "Hey cutie!" or "What-up?" flooded my inbox. One man even said "Send me some body pics babe! Wanna see if you're hot from the waist down too!"

As Hairboy would say, "Yeef!"

You'd think these does and don'ts would go without saying...

Don't have screen names like "Mommywarnedyou" or "HotstuffMike." "Write a profile name that will make someone smile, not that will scare someone off," says Gandhi.

Don't take pictures of yourself with no shirt on in your bedroom. Shirtless photos are already sketchy, but if you want to show off your physique, be doing something, like swimming or fishing or rock climbing. You sitting in your desk chair with no shirt on just brings out all sorts of bad images that you don't want anyone to have in a first impression.

Don't use acronyms in your profile description that might offend, such as WTF or BS.

Do use spell-check when writing your profile. "You are wooing someone with your words so the first impression matters," says Gandhi. "And use punctuation. In this cyber-world, people think they can type the way they would text, and that can come off as lazy."

Don't reach out to people half your age. I got asked out by an 87-year-old man. I'm not against older men — but I will not be dating someone who could be my great-grandfather.

Don't "wink" at people. This is quite possibly more annoying than a million "pokes" on Facebook. If you like someone, send them a note.

Do write them an e-mail. "Take the time to write a good e-mail based on something the target has written," says Gandhi. "It doesn't have to be long — just enough to make them smile. And use the subject line in your e-mail to stand out. Ninety-five percent of people will say 'Hi'. Say something that responds to a comment in their profile. It shows you've actually read what they put out there rather than just looked at the pictures."

Don't be sarcastic. When I was struggling to write my profile, I decided to ask my 5-year-old son to describe me. I thought it was hilarious. But Gandhi warned, "Sarcasm doesn't translate in writing as well. They need to get to know you first, and that may be off-putting."

Unfortunately some men really do need to be whapped upside the head with the stupid stick. (For what it's worth, there are a lot of ridiculously dense women who should learn a lesson or two as well.)

Life as a satisfied singleton life suits me better every day.
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WTF? of the Day:

A new Harvard University study finds that July 4th parades energize only Republicans, turn kids into Republicans, and help to boost the GOP turnout of adults on Election Day.

I don't know what they're smoking in that ivy-covered corner of Cambridge, but it's apparently got some very strange side effects.
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Roughly 530 colleges across the country will soon have to submit special reports to Uncle Sam, explaining why their tuition and student fees have recently surged.

All I have to say is WHAT TOOK SO LONG???
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Obama really should be taking tips from Chicago's new mayor:

Eager to avoid job cuts but more determined to solve a budget crisis, Mayor Rahm Emanuel posed a painful choice for organized labor: face 625 layoffs or sign off on $20 million in work-rule changes by midnight Thursday.

Emanuel said he has identified the 625 employees “as a precautionary measure,” but he refused to identify them, nor would he reveal what city services might be reduced, eliminated or privatized.

The mayor stressed that he does not want to pull the trigger on the layoffs. He insisted that job cuts will not be necessary if organized labor will “be my partner” on $20 million in work rule changes outlined for labor leaders this week that, Emanuel claimed, are already in place in union shops in the private sector.

But the new mayor said he is prepared to balance the city budget, without furlough days that have undermined employee morale and with or without union help.

He's doing a great job of keeping his promises so far.
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Ear Worm of the Day:



I've never been a fan of Rod Stewart... but... I've gotta admit I love the way he does the old standards!

Drive-Bys

"Five percent on millions of dollars of profit creates many jobs . . . As the government gets more and more involved in business and more and more involved in taxes, what you're finding is you're strangling those job-creation vehicles."

Before Greenspon could complete his question, his microphone was cut off and taken out of his hand.

The president disputed Greenspon's statement, saying he's already signed eight pieces of legislation providing small-business tax cuts.

Yessir, President Tin-Ear. That's listening to your constituency and treating them with respect! (And you get extra style points for that nifty microphone grab.)
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Hmmmm. I didn't know this nifty bit of info, and thought I'd share with my fellow deviled egg lovers, too:

The key to perfect deviled eggs is in the selecting and cooking. Buy your eggs a week ahead of cooking so that they will be mature and will be easier to peel. They will also be less likely to crack while cooking. Don't boil the eggs and don't cook them too long. These strategies will avoid tough eggs and those unappetizing gray circles around the yolks.

Very interesting!
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Having lived through not one, but two parents who were in and out of hospitals over time, I found this tip from a Dear Abby reader right on the money:

Please advise your readers that when they send Get Well cards to always use the person's own name -- like, "Betty Jones" instead of "Mrs. John Jones." Also, when sending a card or note to someone in the hospital, put the patient's home address as the return address on the envelope -- not their own. If your readers do this, the person is sure to receive it, even after being discharged from the hospital.

Thank you, Judy from Lorain, OH!
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I think it's fairly obvious that if Rahm Emanuel needs to do a listening tour to find out what's on the minds of folks in Chicago, he's pretty out of touch with the Chicago voting public. Pat Hickey apparently agrees with me. (Spit-take alert)
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Once again academia proves how far outside of the mainstream it really is:

In a proposed resolution, highly-regarded professor Elliott Kaufman suggested that the Faculty Senate ask the board to reconsider its decision, one he said was a conflict-of-interest and "inappropriately influenced by personal and political comments."

He urged board members to "adhere to the ethical constraints that normally govern their meetings."

"Isn't this the new, squeaky-clean, highly-ethical board of trustees? What happened? It is worth airing the laundry here," said Kaufman, who retired last year after serving in numerous faculty leadership positions, in an interview with the Tribune.

"The chair had a conflict of interest and he put the other trustees in an impossible position," Kaufman said. "He drew a dotted line between the assassination of the Kennedy brothers and giving Bill Ayers emeritus status. The result is what we got and I just don't think it was a fair way to do it."

Lurvely, innit?