Leslie's Omnibus

Drive-Bys

For my mommy blogging friends like Kate, Angie, Crystal, Moogie and more, this hilarious woman made my day, and I hope she makes yours, too:

In the bakery, they’re giving away free samples of coffee cake and of course, my kids all take one. The toddler decides he doesn’t like it and proceeds to spit it out in my hand. (That’s what moms do. We put our hands in front of our children’s mouths so they can spit stuff into them. We’d rather carry around a handful of chewed up coffee cake, than to have the child spit it out onto the floor. I’m not sure why this is, but ask any mom and she’ll tell you the same.) Of course, there’s no garbage can around, so I continue shopping one-handed while searching for someplace to dispose of the regurgitated mess in my hand.

In the meat department, a mother with one small baby asks me, “Wow! Are all six yours?”

I answer her, “Yes, but I’m thinking of selling a couple of them.”

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Chicagopedia... because if you're coming to town, you really do need to understand us.
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I look forward to the day when stuff like this isn't front page news any more because it has lost the power to shock or be relevant. Won't that be wonderful?
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Gotta remember to get my ticket tonight.
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He described Gilman as "very remorseful."
I'll bet. Because she got caught. Must be a long-lost relative of Michael Vick's.
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Leslie

1 comment:

Moogie said...

Oh my. This describes everything perfectly. I have DONE this. I also was almost successful in selling my youngest to the cashier at the grocery store...but she wanted a warranted. She comes "as-is." This was hysterical! Thank you!