I giggled... and thought of Joanie. She'll know why.

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I'm sticking this at the top of the page because Joanie has blown the doors off her fellow intrepids and finished her 1,000 words in record time.

Take Three... and call me in the morning. It's a thing of beauty.
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P.S. -- If you want to join in the challenge, email me at omnibus-dot-driver-at-gmail-dot-com. There's always room for one more!

I'd pay big bucks to have the privilege of sitting down to dinner with these two heroes of mine. I get goose bumps just imagining...
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Giggle of the Day:


see more Lolcats and funny pictures
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Will Sanford never shut up already??? Can't keep his pants zipped. Can't keep his lip zipped. What do any of the women in his life see in him???
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Ear Worm of the Day:

Having lived in apartments on and off for most of my adult life...


... this struck me as particularly hilarious. All that, and two new vocabulary words: "graphity" and "repestect" -- love it!
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I am soooo making these cherry brown butter cookie bars. One look at those photos and I was drooling all over my keyboard!
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Speaking of things that send my tastebuds to blisstopia, I just discovered these smartfood cranberry almond popcorn clusters. You'd never know they're gluten-free, contain no MSG and they're only 120 calories a packet! Just one taste, and I was hooked but good.

Now I've got to try the other two flavors.
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Seems like pirates are coming out of the woodwork over at the Field Museum of Natural History. Hmmmm. I wonder if El Cap has a crew of his own? If not, he could always sign on here.
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Take a love of all things Tolkien, throw in some politics, and this is what you get.

Just try and keep a straight face. I dare ya.
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The next time someone tries the "but he grew up in poverty" line on you, or the "it's too hard" line on you, send them over here.

It'll make me think twice about whinging about much of anything, that's for sure. In fact, she's downright inspiring!
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Seeing as it's Therapy Night, this seemed a fitting Ear Worm of the Day:



We'll be at Lloyd's after 5:00 p.m. today. Yes, the venue has changed, but the group is the same. I'll buy the first round of truth serum if you care to join us!

TOTUS, Big Guy and French gays. *Snicker*
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I'm telling you, you've really gotta tune in to this guy any Sunday from 6:00 to 9:00 p.m. As far as I can tell, he thinks the U.S. really should convert to Socialism, we aren't paying enough in taxes, we're too interested in other people's affairs, especially those of public officials, and it doesn't matter whether those people are conducting those affairs on the public's nickel... Not. Our. Business. Oh! And if you disagree with him he's likely to ask if you're either gay or a sexual deviate.

Argh.

Mark it down on your calendar and give him a listen so I don't have to. I'm tired of throwing things and yelling at the radio.
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Take a wander over to Jimbo's Deli. It's the only political lunch spot in the country where you'll actually know what it is you're ordering up.
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Things I Didn't Know:

You can donate platelets twice within a seven-day period if there is at least 72 hours between donations. You may donate up to 24 times a year.

... and...

Donor eligibility criteria are the same for both platelet and whole blood donors. You can donate platelets 72 hours after donating whole blood. If you donate platelets first, you can donate whole blood 72 hours later.

The problem is, once my local blood bank got their hooks into me and knew I'd do the platelets thing, they started calling and emailing me the guilt-inducing "critical shortage" notices just about every 72 hours.

I'm happy to help out, but I really can't be taking off for 2-1/2 hours every three days. And if they had their way, I'd do those 24 donations in the span of 12 weeks. Sheesh!

Update: Three phone calls and two emails in one day trying to get me back in there ASAP. I donated last Tuesday.

If you live in Chicago, LifeSource is experiencing a critical shortage of all blood products, but platelets in particular. Go donate, if you can. (But don't give them a good email or home phone number, whatever you do, or they'll hunt you down like a dog forever.)

I've said it before and I'll say it again -- both of my parents received multiple transfusions of both whole blood and platelets during the course of their cancer treatments.

It may be your kid or your parent or other loved one who needs it one of these days.

I may bitch a little, but I know just how important this is, and how little 2-1/2 hours of time really is.

Just do it.
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see more Lolcats and funny pictures
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And now, a moment of bacon-y bliss.
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Ear Worm of the Day:



Oh, heck. Let's make it a two-fer:



Songs of summer from my young and carefree days!

Giggle of the Day:

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JihadGene says, "It's Friday! Let's Dance!"

How 'bout a little Electric Boogaloo?


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No, Chrissy, I do not agree. But I guess it's your call. Email me when you change your mind or start up a new one, okay?

Dammit.
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Triple Cheese Onion Bacon Buns? Be still, my beating heart! (That just shouldn't be legal.)

(And it would be a great name for a beefcake calendar hunk of the month, now that I think of it.)
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I threw out the challenge here.

The first four intrepid souls to take on the challenge?

Eric
Nancy
Joanie
Rosie

And the sentences?

I hate nature... and WalMart.

And that's when Nana went commando.

Moments like these make me very, very nervous.

Can't WAIT to see what they come up with!

My buddy Mort sent the following warning, which you might want to heed if you're driving anywhere in Illinois this summer:

A REMINDER ... Starting on July 1^st

Illinois will begin using photo radar in freeway work zones in July.
One mile per hour over the speed limit and the machine will get you a nice $375.00 ticket in the mail.

Beginning July 1st, the State of Illinois
will begin using the speed cameras in areas designated as "Work Zones" on major freeways. Anyone caught by these devices will be mailed a $375.00 ticket for the FIRST offense.

The SECOND offense will cost $1,000.00 and comes with a 90-Day license suspension. Drivers will also receive demerit points against their licenses, which then allow insurance companies to raise Insurance rates.

This is the harshest penalty structure ever set for a governmental unit involving PHOTO speed enforcement. The State already has two camera vans on line issuing tickets 24/7 in work zones with speed limits lowered to 45 MPH.

Photos of both the Driver's face and License plate are taken.

In addition, if you do not stop completely at a right turn lane on a 4 way red light with cameras and then make a right turn, you will receive a 4 beautiful sequential pictures of your vehicle’s progress and a $100 ticket.

A Clutter of Quotes:

That’s a damn good idea. You lawyers are fucking smart.

(Namby is a recent discovery who gives me the giggles daily. And he lives in Chicago. Sweet.)

"Don't cry for me Appalachia! The truth is I never hiked you..."

... and...

I believe enduring love is primarily a commitment and an act of will, and for a marriage to be successful, that commitment must be reciprocal.

(Via la Diva Althouse.)

Personally, though, before you decide, I’d advise you to take a moment and consider ALL the implications of the word…’rental.

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sourpuss wants to know what 4 live people you'd like to have dinner with.

I have an even more specific question: What four living bloggers, who you haven't yet met in person, would you like to have dinner with?
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A Chicago grade school will be marching in this year's Gay Pride parade.

Not a good idea.

Why?

Because there are loads of almost completely nude people participating in the parade.

Because most of the floats have themes of a blatantly, overtly, in-your-face sexual content.

Because many of the parade participants and most of the watching crowd is drunk and disorderly.

You want to show your support for the community? Do a nice mural or plant a garden somewhere.

But the parade? No.
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Don't forget about Take Three. There's always room for one more participant!
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Giggle of the Day:


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Ear Worm of the Day:



That was my role in High School. And, yes, I had to learn to tap dance for that. No. I'm no Ruby Keeler. (But I got the job done!)
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One more reason you don't mess with Texas.
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This is just falling out of your chair funny!

Whoooo, boy! Elisson is blogging berries. I love, love, love berries.

If you're not Zonker, then cover your eyes and scroll on down to the next item.

Zonk-man? This one's for you.

Blame Og, not me.
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I just received my order from LoveDesigns over at Artfire -- a necklace, a bracelet and two pairs of earrings, all handmade, for under $50 bucks, including shipping.

Joy and Hannah are evil -- pure evil. I just spent money, and already they're tempting me with this and this and this and this.

Those shameless hussies!
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Padlockable, industrial-strength zippers -- I want them for every married public servant in D.C. or even those thinking about running for an office that would take them there, man and woman alike. I'm sick of crap like this.

(And if the Governor's little jaunt was on the taxpayer's nickel, he should have to pay it back, with interest.)

Update: Prescient? You tell me.
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Current conditions as of 2:16 pm CDT

84°/Thunder

Feels Like: 87°

Barometer:29.91 in and steady

Humidity: 55%

Visibility:10 mi

Dewpoint: 66°

Wind: SSE 9 mph

Sunrise:5:17 am

Sunset:8:31 pm

About a year ago, Miss Nancy and I had a discussion about reviving Chrissy's 1,000 Word Story challenges... with a twist.

Here's the challenge: I send you three sentences. You write 1,000 words in any format you choose -- short story, essay, poetry, screenplay, news article. You must use all three sentences. The twist is that you can use them anywhere you want in the story, as long as all three sentences appear somewhere within your 1,000 words.

I'll select four writers at a time, posting the challenge sentences on Friday, with the 1,000 words due the following Friday.

I enjoyed my own first 1,000 words, and figured it was time to revive the exercise.

I've thrown this out to several bloggers of extraordinary talent, some who've participated before and some who haven't. But that doesn't mean you can't participate, too. Email me at omnibus-dot-driver-at-gmail-dot-com if you're interested. I think it'll be fun.

Anybody up for a challenge?
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Update:

Eric's in!
Nancy's in!
Barrie's in! (I am nothing, if not persistent.)
Joanie's on board!